5 Tips for Working From Home Safely During a Pandemic

Image by Gerd Altmann from Pixabay

It's not every day you find yourself working from home due to a pandemic, so it's probably no surprise that you're not really prepared. Contagion, 28 Days Later, Zombieland - none of these were quite large enough warnings that this day would come and to be prepared. (How's your cardio, by the way?) Assuming COVID-19 doesn't mutate into COVID-19Z, here are some tips you can follow to help ensure you have a safe, productive, and otherwise enjoyable working from home experience over the next several weeks.

#1 Practice Social Distancing

This is just a fancy term meaning 'stay the hell away from me, you potentially infected mutant.' When you're out walking your dog or checking the mail, instead of waving and smiling at your neighbors, move immediately to the other side of the street and avoid making eye contact. Nothing says stay away in quite the same fashion. If a neighbor seems oblivious and continues to approach, cough loudly and make seemingly uncontrollable jerking motions. That's sure to send them running. Are they still shambling forward, and slightly groaning? It might be time to run away!

#2 Stay Active

I guess I keep coming back to cardio, but seriously. Sitting in front of a computer all day will turn you into a zombie long before the virus ever does. Get up, do some squats, walk the dog (keep tip #1 in mind), run up and down the stairs, or maybe even ride the exercise bike that you've neglected for months. When you return to work in a few months, you'll be able to show off the results from your COVID-19 diet and exercise regimen. 

#3 Maintain Proper Lighting

No, I'm not just talking about motion sensor lights to warn of approaching zombies. You definitely need to ensure your work space has adequate lighting while not having too much glare form overhead lights or sunshine. Long periods of working in low light areas can be harmful for your eyes, which - you guessed it, might make it hard for you to react when being charged by zombie hordes. Take breaks from staring at your screen, too. Societal norms recommend a break every 20 minutes or so. 

#4 Communicate

In addition to making sure your ham radio, short wave radios, and other survival equipment are functioning properly, you'll want to make sure you're checking in regularly with your co-workers, friends, and family. Until the communication grid goes down, cell phones, instant messaging and conferencing apps, and even phone calls are all great choices. When video conferencing, having the perfect webcam angle is key. Not too high, not too low. Just right. While chatting with your friends and colleagues, I personally recommend sneaking in questions about the status of their survival stores. You never know if you might need to 'borrow' some of their gear later. 

#5 Stay Calm

All joking aside (which is rare for me), stay calm and don't panic. There's no need to hoard toilet paper, milk, paper towels, and (seemingly) cat litter. All you're doing is causing a bit of a domino effect, making it harder for everyone to have access to basic necessities. If  COVID-19Z becomes a reality, the last thing you will care about is toilet paper. Believe me. Do hoard Twinkies, though. It seems they're a precious commodity (and they also last for ages).

Note: If you haven't figured it out yet, COVID-19Z is the name I've coined for when the Coronavirus mutates and starts turning ordinary people into brain-eating zombies.